ARE YOU READY FOR REAL CHANGE?
You're ready for something different.
Maybe you want to build more authentic relationships.
Maybe you're tired of repeating patterns that just don’t fulfill you.
Maybe you've tried everything you can think of and you still feel stuck.
No matter the struggle that brought you here, you want to change your relationship patterns and deepen the connections that matter most.
It's time to create meaningful change.
It's time to create lasting change.
I've helped hundreds of folks who want to rethink the way they do relationships and build authentic connected partnerships. Join me to change the way you love.
All the work I do begins with a free consultation with prospective clients. This is how we determine if we're a good fit to work together. Use the calendar below to schedule your free consultation today.
SET IT UP
WHAT TO EXPECT
WHAT I DO
- Bring a decade of experience helping hundreds of incredible people deeply connect to themselves and the people they love
- Help you listen and communicate effectively, end repetitive argument cycles, and let go of baggage
- Use a sex-positive framework and vast sexuality knowledge to fan flames of passion between you
- Identify ways to manage intense emotions
- Rebuild trust and intimacy if it's waning
- Use a strengths-based approach to help you grow
- Keep momentum and hope alive - even if it's hard for you to feel hopeful
- Deeply care about your personal growth and well-being and at the same time hold you accountable to the goals you set for yourself
WHAT I DON'T DO
- Sit and nod - instead, we'll take action. Be forewarned: I've been described as "direct and not-coddling."
- Add shame or judgment to your experience (there's already too much of that in the world)
- Collude with you when you're being too hard on yourself
- Treat you like you're broken (because you're not)
- Assume your experience is the same as mine or anyone else's
- Pathologize you (I don't treat mental illness, so you won't receive a diagnosis, assessment or treatment for mental health conditions or substance use)
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
How is coaching different from counseling?
Yes, I have completed a masters in counseling, and counseling is important reflective healing work, but my clients come to me hoping to take action for change. That's where coaching comes in.
Counseling (the "assessment and treatment of mental health disorders") is about asking why something is happening. Coaching doesn't assess or treat these disorders- my clients are healthy. Instead we ask what you want to do differently. How do you want to change?
You're pretty friendly, how is this different from a friendship?
Having friendly relationships with my clients is important to me, but this isn't a friendship per se. Whenever we meet I'm working for you providing facilitated space, open-mindedness, years of experience and training, and deep professional care.
What's different than friendship is:
- I bring ten years of professional expertise and training helping people build healthy relationships
- I don't have personal attachment to your story so I won't offer judgment and you don't have to question my motives
- You don't have to take care of my feelings or needs- this is a one-way relationship
- I won't hit on you, sleep with you, or date you- our boundaries remain clear no matter how intimate our conversation
- I won't search you online or in social media, what you choose to bring to session is up to you
- The things you say to me remain strictly confidential (see more on this below)
How long are sessions?
Sessions are 55-80 minutes long. I ask you to reserve 90 minutes for our meeting each time we schedule. Many of my clients arrive 15 minutes early to collect their thoughts before session- I highly recommend it.
How often will we meet?
I recommend meeting weekly. This is the best way to implement real lasting change.
There are a small number of clients who I have worked with for a while who want to invest in pro-active relationship maintenance. We've generally cleared up the initial concerns they brought to my office, but they want a container to hold their conflicts with care moving forward. We typically meet every other or third week for this kind of preventative relationship care work.
How long do you meet with people?
Most clients work with me 4 months minimum. Many clients choose to stay on for monthly relationship maintenance meetings to help keep their relationships healthy.
I'm proud that over 50% of my clients return years after working together to start up again when new issues arise. They enjoyed our work together, found it helpful, and want to work with someone who knows their back story.
Where is your office/Where will we meet?
All my initial free consultations happen on the phone.
Once we've decided to work together we may meet on the phone or in my office in Northeast Portland, OR. My office is in the Overlook/Arbor Lodge neighborhoods at the corner of N Denver and N Killingsworth. You can take the Max or the bus easily and there is ample street parking.
I also see long distance clients via video chat Monday-Thursday mornings (PST) and on occasion will see clients online on the weekend. Let me know in our initial consultation if you're interested in online support.
How much does this work cost?
Initial phone consultations are free. First sessions for couples are $200 and first solo sessions are $175. Ongoing couples sessions are $175 and solo sessions are $125.
Do you offer sliding-scale or reduced fee sessions?
I do reserve a small number of spaces for reduced rate clients who make a lower income. Some of my clients also meet with me less frequently to make this work fit in their budgets. Let me know if you need help affording our work.
Do you bill insurance?
I would never share your personal information with a corporation- so no, I do not bill insurance. Some of my clients have used Flex Spending Accounts and Health Savings Accounts to work with me successfully.
Will you see either of us individually if we also see you as a couple?
I will see you individually to work on issues related to the relationship. But if you want additional support for other areas of your life, or very intense self-work I will likely refer you out.
How does confidentiality work?
Everything you say to me in session is kept confidential on my end forever. There are only a few exceptions to this:
- If you are abusing someone in your care, or your partner, or yourself I'll likely have to report your abuses
- If you are planning to kill yourself or another person I will report your plans
- If you contact me using the internet, social media, email, or a smart phone I have no control over the confidentiality of the information you share (but google, facebook, etc will)
- I am currently receiving supervision for both a Sex Counselor and a Master Coach credential and will talk with my supervisor about my client work- but I will remove identifying information in these conversations.
How do you maintain boundaries with a community so interconnected?
It's not uncommon for one of my clients to have some familiarity with others. But your confidentiality is of utmost importance. If there's something that feels uncomfortable we'll talk about it, but I won't be able to share information about any of my other clients, famous or not, past or present.
Your information is safe with me.
I also don't discuss my own personal connections, interests, desires, or activities with clients. If I show up at an event and a client is in attendance I will probably leave. I do this to maintain a professional relationship, instead of beginning a personal one (that could complicate our work together). I'd rather maintain extra distance than harm our work.
What if we stop working together?
Your confidentiality is respected even if we stop working together. Once you become one of my clients you can always return to our work, so your information will wait in a secure vault if (until) you decide to return.
50% of my clients return years after we resolve their initial concerns to talk about new things that arise because we've built a solid foundation of trust.